“Classes that suck need to have clocks that work.”

“In case you've forgotten, The Hustler's opinion policy requires columnists to use ‘logical argument,’ not hypocrisy and stereotypes. Mike Warren's ‘Vanderbilt is not hateful and intolerant’ article was hateful and intolerant. Andrew Solomon's ‘article’ blatantly promoted the typical stereotype of Vanderbilt women and that was ALL IT DID. You should either follow your own opinion policy or stop printing it.”

“I would like to take an opposing stance to Lil Jon's argument, albeit well-pontificated, on the subject of his intelligence, ‘I am the wild and crazy, and out-there guy who's always screaming, but I'm intelligent too.’ Look at him. Both pictures.”

“I mean it: Undergrads, get out of the Divinity Library! We don't like you. Neither does Jesus. To the left, to the left, goats! Everything you own (leggings, Vera Bradley bags) — and your very existence in our library — sends you to the left!”

“Dear blood-drivers and MarrowThoners on the wall: While I respect the importance of what you do, please stop badgering me with ‘Why not?’ and ‘Ah, come on, it doesn't hurt that much’ or ‘It's just a cheek swab’ when I reject you. “No” is a sufficient answer. I do not need to give you a run-down of my medical history to explain my inability to give blood or donate marrow. Please realize that some people give, some people don't, and some people just plain can't. So from those of us with medical histories that prevent us from donating to your great cause, please respect our simple ‘no.’”

“Of all the times for a TV channel to stop working, why must it be ESPN2 when I wake up at 5 a.m. to watch the Red Sox opening day game?”

“Why did the entire rest of the state of Tennessee get to watch the VU women's basketball game versus WVU in its entirety, while people watching on Vandy's campus, of all places, couldn't watch the Vandy game at all??? It would have been nice to actually watch and cheer on our team that made it to the Sweet 16.”

“Dear Vanderbilt,
Thank you for putting a notice on my door about the work being in Kissam Quad over spring break. I'm confused by the fact I am waking up to the sounds of drilling and hammering at EIGHT in the morning when the work was supposedly done over spring break. Thank you, Vanderbilt, for making Kissam Quad more unbearable to live in.”